Every church, organization, family, group of people operate according to a set of values, they may be stated or not, but they determine and regulate how people get along when they are together. 

There are some kinds of values that are ‘aspirational’ values, we endeavor to embody these, they are ‘ideals’ but sometimes they are so high they are not attainable.  But we need aspirational values because they help us become more than we are, they challenge us to chage.

Then there are the actual values – the ones we actually live by.  This is what ‘really’ happens. 

We could have an aspirational value of always starting on time, but an actual value of leasure so everyone knows we never start on time -

Where our asperational values and our actual values match up

Jesus gave us a command that is both asperational and actual – it is both challenging and something we can accoplish

Matthew 22:37-39

Jesus replied: "'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.'  This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' NIV

The Bridge is committed to knowing, loving and following Jesus and making His love known

Jesus taught us to love God and others and to express that in all the ways that we live. 

It is our desire to bring glory to God, and because He is love the best way we can glorify God in our lives is to let His love live in us.  It is not easy to love God let alone loving others, but that is something we are continuing to build into our lives.  As we learn to love others we are making choices and setting patterns into our lives that bear good fruit in our relationships.  As these patterns become the preferential way of living we begin to experience the blessings God desires for us and we discover our lives are truly bringing glory to God.

• This command teaches us we are going to express love in the actual ways we live.  Loving God and others shows up in time and space – in real actions we do
• People live out of who they are.  The way a person lives is the culmination of his or her value set, and it is out of those values that a person acts, dreams and responds to life situations.

Our values determine how we relate to one another within our church and how we relate to the community around us.

To guide us, we have a common set of values that help us achieve becoming the people God is calling us to be, we call them the:

 HEART ATTITUDES

The Heart Attitudes are intended to shape how we live and relate to others, but we can not do this, we will not do this a part from our own personal relationship with God.

1.   Pursue a personal relationship with God through Jesus Christ

Colossians 2:6-7

So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live in him,  rooted and built up in him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness.

Foundational to our encounter with God.  We can live with hope today because Jesus brings it into our lives.   He is restoring our relationship with God and that required our salvation; and that is what Jesus came to provide.  Apart from God we were spiritually dead.  Through faith in Jesus’ death and resurrection we are able to live beyond our physical circumstances and become spiritually alive.

Our relationship with Jesus brings freedom from our past, strength for our days and hope for our future.  Jesus’ death on the cross is the single only event that truly frees us from the guilt of our sins and we are able to experience real freedom.  Jesus begins to live in us and he teaches us through Scripture, the Holy Spirit and each other how to encounter God in the midst of our daily lives.  Our spiritual strength grows as we allow Jesus to have authority in our lives.  We discover God’s purposes for our lives as we let Him set the directions and pace for our lives.

On-Going practice – Our relationship with Jesus grows as we spend time with him. 
Practical suggestions:

            Spend time reading, studying, memorizing and meditating on The Bible

            Discover the power and purpose of prayer

            Allow Jesus to shape your attitudes

Commit to be part of a church – you need other Christians to help you, to encourage you and walk along side of you. 

2.    Living an honest open life

Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all members of one body.        Ephesians 4:25

Living truthfully is the best way to follow Jesus faithfully and demonstrate we trust him

Discretion with integrity -  lifestyle of modesty and respect for self and others

Not transparent – gushing out everything – discretion needed

Honesty, openness are needed.  Lies isolate.  Relationships are built on trust.

Eph 4:25 put off falsehood …

Part of the same body – need truth flowing between us

I John 1:7- if we walk in the light as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another

One of the ten commandments is do not give false testimony -  ‘do not lie’

Eph 4:15   truthing in love – we do the truth, live the truth, speak the truth – truth flows between us

Not a dirty laundry show – basic integrity between the person inside and the image I present on the outside.  Life is not better than it really is nor is it worse than it really is – it is real

Private areas – you need question askers in your life.

3.    Putting the goals and interests of others above your own

Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourselves.  Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.             Philippians 2:3-4

John 13:34-35   Giving a new commandment…That you love one another as I have loved you.

Earlier commandment: That you love one another as yourselves

Normally we put ourselves first.  Jesus gives a new standard – loving sacrificially.

Phil 2:3-4  Do nothing out of selfish ambition…

We have our concerns – we need to give on them. 

Take care of other people too.  Decide to be inconvenienced. 

Phil 2:19-20

Paul about Timothy – I have no one else like him who looks out

 for your interests   -  We notice the lives of others -

There will be interest conflicts - need to sacrifice for others.

Meet the needs of people while keeping boundaries – need to look out for your responsibilities while at the same time inconveniencing yourself for others.

4.    We Build and Maintain healthy relationships

Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you,  leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to your brother; then come and offer your gift.

Matthew 5:23-24

God intends us to enjoy close relationships.

Its normal to offend people. – we expect we will sin against each other

Normal – offense occurs, festers, abandon the relationship

God intends us to take our friends into the future with us.

Eph 4:31 – get rid of bitterness, rage, anger, brawling, slander

Acts 24:16 – strive always to keep my conscience clear before God & man

Initiative always lies with you. 

Ask if you’ve offended, when you sense there’s something between you.

   Explore when not sure.

When we ‘mess-up’ we ‘fess-up’  Ask forgiveness without blaming them.  My problem is my sin.

Not “if I offended you, then I’m sorry.”  Rather “I was wrong, will you forgive me?”

Give forgiveness – commitment not to blame someone any more.

Not forgive and forget – can’t make yourself forget, but can choose not to dwell on it.

Then turn your mind to the greatness of God and his forgiveness of you.

John 13:34-35

 "A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.  By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another."

5.   Giving and receiving spiritual correction

No one has it all together.

Hebrews 3:12-13

12 See to it, brothers, that none of you has a sinful, unbelieving heart that turns away from the living God. 13 But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called Today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin's deceitfulness. NIV

Friends help friends live rightly – sin is deceitful- we can head out in a direction we think is right, but a friend can blow a whistle before trouble strikes, sin will harden hearts and isolate and alienate, to help a friend will sometimes require us to take a risk for their good

Prov 9:8

 Do not rebuke a mocker or he will hate you; rebuke a wise man and he will love you.

Prov  -  a rebuke is like a badge of honor

   We take a great risk in the relationship when we warn someone.

Speaking the truth in love.

Needs to be an encouraging environment – we look for the good in others

need to catch each other doing things that are right

Hebrews 10:24  And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds.

Think about how to encourage others, but still speak truth.  90% encouragement, 10% correction.

Build ‘whistle blowers’ into your life – give trusted friends permission to speak into your life when it is needed.  Decide in your heart they are helping you succeed. 

Love God with all heart, soul, mind, strength – then do something.

6.  Participating in the Ministry

Each one should use whatever gift he has received to serve others, faithfully administering God's grace in its various forms.

1 Peter 4:10

We like being together – a Volunteer spirit makes life better

You bless God and others by participating.  You have an important role to play in the ministry that God has fit you into.  When you don’t participate – everyone misses the blessing God intends to bring through your life. 

When you give of yourself, you will discover more about yourself, others and what God is doing around you.  The best way to discover your spiritual gift is to begin serving – anywhere.

Think about where you have been served and look for ways to serve too.  If you have been blessed by the refreshments then maybe you can help in that area, or if you have been touched by a greeter or you are grateful for the childrens ministries, then maybe that is the area God has for you to serve as well.

Plan to come early and stay late – When you make your heart available you will discover the opportunities to be involved.  Then help out beyond you specialty, that is when you truly become a blessing.

7.  Support the Work Financially

Tenth of income is holy and belongs to Him

Jesus affirms

For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.     Matt 6:21

Another way to participate

God is looking for the heart that will trust him in everything, including finances. 

Everything we have is from the Father, God has entrusted us with material and financial resources, we have no more than he has entrusted us with.  It is not the amount we have that is important, but  what we do with what he has given us. 

We give to the things we believe in.  There is great fulfillment in giving when we believe God desires to involve us in His work.  As we live with open hands, God is able to turn our lives and resources into streams of blessings for others.  In giving, we demonstrate that we are trusting in God’s strength more than our own financial strength or earning capacity.  As you help out financially the work God has given His people moves forward.

We give because we trust God and desire to obey him, That is when we discover more about ourselves and God. 

2 Corinthians 9:6-7

6 Remember this: Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously. 7 Each man should give what he has decided in his heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver. NIV

Financial challenges hit everyone and we are called to encourage one another – even in this area.  When you Share the desires and struggles with one another, God can use the faith of others to help us walk in faith ourselves. 

Guideline:  Start with small percent and increase it

As you help out financially the whole thing moves forward

8.  Following Spiritual Leadership within Scriptural limits

Obey your leaders and submit to their authority. They keep watch over you as men who must give an account. Obey them so that their work will be a joy, not a burden, for that would be of no advantage to you.

Hebrews 13:17

Common to resist authority – mankind has struggled with it from the garden

Following leadership important in any group

God has entrusted us with leaders.  Leadership is a godly and noble calling.  The leadership style taught and demonstrated by Jesus was that of a servant, the one who consistently and faithfully put aside their own interests to lead others.  Leadership is a demanding role and should be honored by those following.

Godly leadership has the needs and interests of those following in mind.  Godly leaders lead in the directions God wants the group to go.  They also are looking out for the best of those following.  These leaders carry a big responsibility, there should be no reason to make their job more challenging by working against them.  When godly leadership is in place those following will flourish.

Accept direction from those leading…

1 Pt 5:5-8       -           don’t bow your neck

If you bow your neck you will be subject to the enemy

Put yourself under the direction of the leadership

Godly leadership is always subject to scriptural boundaries…

Acts 20:28

28 Keep watch over yourselves and all the flock of which the Holy Spirit has made you overseers. Be shepherds of the church of God, which he bought with his own blood.

By following leadership we are fostering an environment of trust which is crucial to build a relationship. 

Relationships are about giving ourselves to one another, and you can see that in these heart attitudes, they practical ways for us to do that – give ourselves to one another, to care for, each other. 

We would not do this naturally, and can not do it without the help the Christ brings into our lives. 

This brings us back to where we started, it is all about a personal relationship with Jesus, who gave himself for us,. 

Jesus said…

John 13:34-35   "A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. 35 By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another."

John 15:12-14

12 My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. 13 Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.